At last, we were alone. My husband had handed over the remote control to our new Tivo before he and the kids headed upstairs to bed for the night. I ran my fingers over the smooth buttons, and contemplated an exciting evening ahead. An evening in which I would watch the shows I want to see. An evening where I’d flip the channel from my favorite show to another favorite show, never once stopping on “Man vs. Nature” or any of those other testosterone-laden shows I usually get stuck watching in this house full of males.

“Mom!” my son yelled down the stairs. “Tape Mythbusters, please!”

Oh, alright. But that’s it. The rest of the night would be mine.

First, I flipped on coverage of the Williams sisters’ U.S. Open quarterfinal match. Between games, I dropped by to see what Tivo had recorded for me, having asked my husband, who usually lords over the remote, to set it up. I chose an episode of “The Colbert Report” and turned up the volume. When my son came downstairs to get something, I hit PAUSE on the Rated TV-14 show and waited for him to leave the room. Then I flipped over to the U.S. Open to check the score before hitting PLAY again.

I felt like a kid who had borrowed Dad’s Corvette while he was on a business trip. It was exciting, fast and fun. It was… wait a minute. Why is “South Park” on here? I wondered. I soon found out that Tivo makes recommendations based on your viewing habits. It must have decided that since I like other Comedy Central shows, I’d like to watch the foul-mouthed cartoon children on “South Park,” too, but it was wrong. So I deleted it and went back to watching shows and flipping channels.

When Colbert ended, I discovered that the Tivo had taped “The Closer” several times. I watched a little more tennis, and then I watched “The Closer,” with multiple interruptions — my own interruptions — to see who was winning the match. Then I asked the Tivo

to tape StandUp2Cancer on Friday night, a stand-up comic act on Saturday and a “season’s pass” for Sunday night’s “Mad Men,” a show I’ve always wanted to watch, except it airs past my bedtime. And the VCR is just too much of a pain to set.

It was a mom’s dream night on the couch. No men or boys around to override my choices with “Future Cars” or “How it’s Made,” a show that’s like a 1970’s science class film strip, only drier and slower. I mean, really, a girl can only take so much “Mythbusters” before she starts to wish they’d just blow up the set while trying to prove that sharks can catch bullets in their teeth — or whatever — and be done with it.

No, a girl needs her shows. A girl, it seems, needs her Tivo. And I can’t wait until we’re alone again.

– Jen Singer

Filed under General, Tweens

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